Review: Where She Went by Gayle Foreman (If I Stay #2)

Where She Went resumes the story of Adam and Mia that began in If I Stay. The story is set three years from the ending of the first book, this time told from Adam's perspective. From the looks of things, both he and Mia have turned out to be quite successful musicians, although both have received that recognition quite differently.

Mia has developed into a renowned cellist, setting off an international tour with a concert in Carnegie Hall. Adam has risen to the level of ridiculously famous rock star and is dating a well-known actress/producer that makes regular appearances in the tabloids. Unlike Mia, he has grown weary of the music he is making, the people in his band, and his complete lack of privacy. The recognition and fame both Adam and Mia have received is slightly fantastical for the short amount of time that has passed, but it could happen. It just goes to show that a lot can change in three years.

Like If I Stay, there is a dual time perspective. Though the storyline follows Adam's current life, much of his time is spent reminiscing over the past three years or even from the time before the accident. At times, it feels like attention is retracted from important things, such as Mia's time at Juilliard. Perhaps this is because I am a mediocre musician, but this school and the students that come out of it have always fascinated me. Not only does the story gloss over the three years following Mia's accident, it skips over what I imagine to be a course of very intense and rigorous study. However, it is interesting that both stories follow this format, this division between the present and the past. It strikes me that both books take place after their main event has already occurred. In If I Stay, the accident has already happened. In Where She Went, the revolving factor is Adam and Mia's breakup.

This book is incredibly well written. In fact, I think it is much more fluid than the first one. There are many similarities between the two, but there is a very clear distinction between Mia's voice and Adam's. Adam is quite eloquent about his feelings, both in his narrative and the lyrics he writes for the album Collateral Damage.

I did say in my review of the first book that I do not care for Adam very much. Honestly, despite the enjoyment of reading this, that opinion did not change. Rather than being sympathetic for him, as I know I should have been, I really just wanted to tell him to get over himself and to move on with his life. Really, he spends so much of his time pining over Mia that there is room for little else other than a rapid spiral of self-destruction.

I also dislike the notion of the "one and only.” It just contributes to the idea that it is impossible to get past breakups. The fact that fate brings Mia and Adam back together justifies the three years he has spend holding onto her, justifies his waiting as a rational thing to do. Splitting up with someone you love is always hard, but it is not undoable. Mia and Adam's breakup lacks closure, but sometimes you don't get closure. Sometimes things simply end and you have to move on with your life.

To be fair, Adam tells us that he and Mia never have an official breakup. One day she just stops talking to him. I was a little disappointed in Mia when I read this, as it makes her a much less sympathetic character. Sure, it explains why he is so hung up on it and why he is so desperate to know the “why” of things, but it does not rationalize the aching that goes on for years and years.

Enough of that. The "one and only" spiel is probably just a personal issue I have with this book, one that I need to work past.

 Once again, music plays a very crucial part in this story. Although Adam has come to resent the music along with the other aspects of his life, it is exciting to read about the rekindling of his passion. It is good to see the blame shift from music in general to the music he is currently making. There is a sort of hope unveiled as, towards the end, he realizes that his musical journey is not over; only this chapter is.

It's also great to see a different form of music in this book. It's no longer just Mia's cello playing and Adam's guitar. At the beginning of every chapter, there is an excerpt of one of Adam's songs from his album Collateral Damage. Perhaps even more so than the rest of the story, these lyrics convey the depths of his despair, longing, and betrayal.

To be honest, my first notion about this book was that it is unnecessary. I liked the ending of If I Stay and would have been just fine with things being left that way. However, as the pages progressed, I actually began to enjoy this book. Its resolution wraps up just a little too tidily for my taste, but, despite my earlier complaints, this book is a quick and enjoyable read.

Review: If I Stay by Gayle Forman (If I Stay #1)

If I Stay follows Mia's story, a girl reminiscing on her old life and watching over her wounded body in present time. In the opening chapter, her family has a terrible car crash that rips them torn apart. Both parents die immediately, leaving Mia and her much younger brother in critical health.

Though the story is centered around the time of the accident, half the time Mia is recalling events that happened in her past. Very little of her memories are in chronological order, as she remembers everything from her young childhood to situations that happened mere days ago. Many of her memories are centered on her boyfriend, Adam, who has been steadily drifting apart from her. Other memories pertain to her family, her family friends, her longtime best friend, and her passion of playing the cello.   

One of the things I like about this book is that Mia does not come out and tell the reader that she is devastated. In fact, I was initially a bit surprised by her lack of reaction. This absence of reaction could be attributed to shock, but she speaks very articulately and lucidly about both her past and her present. It is only as you continue reading that you begin to experience the overwhelming love she feels for her family and friends and the astounding despair she experiences at their loss. Mia tells the story in a detached voice. It is her stories themselves that make you see the incredible depths that she loves her family.

Another great thing about this book is its focus on music. Regardless of whether Mia is the midst of a memory or she is watching the horror of her present life, music saturates every page. From her rock-and-roll parents to her punk boyfriend to her personal lifelong obsession with classical composers, music is a crucial part of this story, incorporated both thoroughly and well.

But Mia is not portrayed as a prodigy. She is painted as someone who has worked very hard to get where she is. In her younger years, her parents complain about the noises her cello makes when she practices, but she practices for hours and hours regardless. She feels anxious and self-conscious when performing. And, despite her astounding ability, Mia is neither an arrogant nor conceited. She is instead a very quiet, shy person. She is mature, but not unrealistically so. This book very truly could have been told from the voice of a teenager.

The fact that this book has a sequel with the same characters gives away the harsh decision portrayed in the title: whether to hold onto her life or to go forward into whatever death holds for her. However, that does not take away from the journey or its struggles. It's astounding that she has any decision at all in it. From the medical scenes in this book, it is very evident that Mia is entirely control of her own fate. When she is feeling warm toward those who remain, her health improves. When she feels the despondency from all she has lost, her health suffers. Though this is most likely not realistic, it is nothing short of fascinating.

I have praised this book a good deal, although I think I like the subject matter more than I liked the book itself. Mia felt very real to me, but perhaps that sense of realness comes in part from mundane descriptions of her life before the accident. The whole story is not entertaining; in fact, parts of it are even boring. But that just adds meat to the skeleton of Mia's character and to many of the other characters that decorate her life.

One exception to this is Adam. Her parents, their friends, her brother, her best friend... they are all great. In fact, with the exception of Mia's cello prowess, those characters are perhaps more interesting and entertaining than Mia herself. But Mia's love interest falls a tad short in my mind. I'm not sure what it is about Adam that I don't connect with. I think it may have been the feeling that I was supposed to like him and be impressed by him that ignited the dislike.

Regardless, the reality of this book is undeniable and heartbreaking. The dual time periods of the past and the present mixed with the lack of chronology leave you with a sense of vertigo. At first, the mix gives you a little confusion about the specifics, but the overall big picture comes together wonderfully.